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im wanting to do a sanded tank for soft water fish as far as plants i want swords,anubis and such....any sugestions as far as ph buffers for the substrate or a good sand to keep ph down...also dose any one have any plants to trade or sell

First off, you mentioned soft water and lowering (acidifying) the pH in the same thought. Hardness and pH are two separate things. (Plus, there are two kinds of hardness-- general and carbonate.) Although soft water is commonly acid and hard water is commonly alkaline (basic), it is possible to have soft alkaline water and hard, acid water. So be sure you know what you want to accomplish. If you want to acidify water, a better way might be to add CO2, which also feeds the plants.

Maybe your tap water is different than what is here in Rogers, but the tap water here in NW Arkansas is generally fine for growing plants. They've grown very well in it for me. I would not mess with the water chemistry at all (except for dechlorinating)-- especially since most acidifying buffers contain phosphates as the active ingredient. Adding phosphates is a recipe for algae, even in a well-planted tank.

As far as substrates go, I like using laterite supplements-- a type of iron rich clay. You mix laterite in the bottom layer of gravel to supply iron to plant roots. API First Layer Pure Laterite and Tetra Initial D are examples of products. I've also heard recommendations for using SeaChem Flourite substrate instead of gravel. I've never used it, though. So I have no personal feelings about it.